On being an ally, and why it’s never us v them

Some wise words to think upon.

Jay Northcote

Sometimes in the queer romance community — and especially when there is something going on that’s caused offence and triggered a heated debate — it can feel uncomfortably like an us v them situation, with cis straight allies feeling unwelcome and unappreciated.


This makes me sad, because I know that the vast majority of the cis straight authors and readers are doing their best to support the LGBT+ community.

But also, I think it’s really important to remember that it’s not us v them. Those of us who identify as LGBT+ still need to be good allies to each other.

Just because you identify as LGBT+ yourself, that doesn’t automatically give you a free pass. We can still fuck up and make mistakes and hurt people. I’ve done that myself, more than once, and it’s hard to admit that and apologise (humble pie tastes like crap) but it’s necessary.


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Safe Spaces

Some important words from author Lane Hayes

Lane Hayes

14358723_10210514457441419_5523324845749074658_nPolitics isn’t one of my favorite topics. It’s always been one of those divisive conversations that can turn a dinner party upside down after a few too many glasses of wine. I rarely if ever talk politics in an MM romance forum. To me this is a sacred place. A safe space where we celebrate the beauty of love. However, the US entered a new era last week. A scary one that threatens freedom and equality, the very premise our nation was founded upon. I’d be concerned no matter what, but as the parent of a gay son, I have an acute sense of worry I haven’t felt since my son was battling bullies in grade school.

We recently had a conversation about “safe spaces” and how the term relates to him as a young gay man living in San Francisco, which is arguably one of the most LGBT-friendly communities…

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